The Story of Nurul,Aishah,Cha2,AkaZukii

why can't life be much easier than this? no complications, no agonies, no worries...just pleasant....everyday, but we would not call that life now would we?

Friday, April 13, 2007

To be or Not to be?

The dead Poet: Monsieur William Shakespeare 1564-1616

I'm pretty sure most of you have heard of this famous phrase that was coined by Shakespeare in one of his famous masterpiece-Hamlet. The question of life, making choices between right or wrong, live or die....So wretched was life, that suicide would be preferable, except we're too afraid of what may come after death..thus, forever wretched we will be, confused of choices to make that could lead us to point of insanity.

If in Hamlet, the prince was in dilemma, his indecisiveness and uncertainty with life vs death, action vs non-action...., I, in a way, have issues of my own,dilemma..questions of life. Fortunately for me, my uncertainty towards this one thing in life won't drag me suicidal,BUT, enough to bemuse me, for I'm now still more confused than ever of 'ending' it or 'not-ending it'.

How can we ever know of which road to take? Of what life will bring? One of my greatest fears in life will forever be- regrets! all thanks to my sordid past experiences. I'm petrified! At 25 years of age, I'm full of stressed. I'm beginning to feel the burdensome weight as an adult, and i LOATHE it!

My lassitude of making this one decision is such that I don't even bothered to ponder upon it now, rather I'm letting it be, roaming in whichever ways it may take me. Dense? Perhaps..but am so afraid of Karma , afraid I'll end up living out the infamous quote of what goes around comes around..scary.

#Of Lust or Love

L.O.V.E is such a confusing issue to comprehend. To love or not to love? To have and to hold or not having it at all? Even if you think, you have it with you, L.O.V.E is so elusive that it's a challenge to even find it, and even more challenging to preserve it, safeguarding it from all possible way of tarnishing it. Love or lust? For people keep telling me it's should be the first one. If you got love you'll definitely have lust. But that's not necessarily the case if you have lust. Lust is ground zero for hormones-it's nature's way of bringing the opposite sexes together to mate. Without it, it's doubtful that love between the two sexes can prosper.
One thing for sure, though it's love or lust-both are intertwined. Lust, just like love are-BLIND.

So the sappiness aside, the question remains, what if there's no love nor lust,but you find yourself still hanging in there, although you could be holding on a very thin thread. Love is a shared feeling between two people who have a vested interest in one another happiness. Love is not about jealousy. It is not about conflict. It is not about testing. Love is a positive feeling. If it is tainted by mistrust, jealousy, insecurity or spitefulness it is not really love but merely a pale copy.

Love is the total surrender of your heart to another person with the security of knowing they will treat it better than you will. Love should feel good. It should not feel bad. Love should make you want to be a better person, it should not lead you to do something self destructive. Love is not demanding of your spirit but lifts it and makes it glow. Love is a good thing. Anything less is lust, deep friendship or attraction.

#Of Extension + Compensation = Decision!

Ridiculous. Have you ever come across such equation in life? Won't be elaborating the details here as it "abunai" to do so. Thus,keep me mouth shut-airtight,fingers crossed, all feelings should be bottled inside, tucked away under me bed, until it antagonize me so much so I'll explode. Am I a sinner to even insinuating this ill-feeling into me minds? Atashii wa tsukaretta! To be or not to be?