The Story of Nurul,Aishah,Cha2,AkaZukii

why can't life be much easier than this? no complications, no agonies, no worries...just pleasant....everyday, but we would not call that life now would we?

Sunday, February 26, 2006

tis 0341 the wee morning....still wide awake...outside is pouring rain...with weather like tis i shud be sleeping, as it is quite cool..but why am i still awake??

i dont know why, but eversince im back here in uitm after the splendid 7 months in japan, life has been really hard and demanding...pretty sordid for me...been having series of misfortune and bad lucks...keep coming me way...and what is more disturbing, i have changed to a boring person...and chubby as well, which i very much hate that fact! **self-loathing mode on now**

what is new?? least nothing much..from today onwards, work gonna be tons...and will keep me very busy. why? it's the grand finale for BERSAMAMU program, which will be transmitted live from the official residence of YAB Deputy Prime Minister...big deal huh? with all the chaos, i was put in charged of getting all the VIPs vox-pop or brief interviews that will be inserted in the one hour live program...which also means, i have , for the very first time, go out alone..leading the crew....fixing up the appointments and such, and getting the job done...well sure, it's only 2 mins airtime for each vox-pop, but i'm dealing with VIPs some of which is datuk, so i cant just asked 2 simple can i?let them speak i'd say, and it's up to me to cut it off and edit things out for 2 mins tx.

at first i was assigned to get 3 governmental offices to talk, now i'm burden with more incoming vox-pop in such a short time..i hate tht! tis not easy to get this orang gomen to talk people!!documents and such...pergh...malas tul!and with such a short time, im afraid i'll fail in getting this task done as i did before around last week..huhu (the first time i fail mind u..but it's a learning process for me...lesson learnt?always get an updates even tho it was agreed that u are gonna get an interview)

amidst the frustration, desperation, frenziness,hopelessness......few hearts that is close to mine had to be taken care of..but i failed in doin particular is 'C2C'...just happend that i am having the hell of time when C2C wanted me so soryy C2C.i failed in pleasing ya...and now C2C has gone...leaving me empty...huhu **sob sob** and so are the other me mom's for instance. she too merajuk with me...hey just an ordinary people (tribute to john legend) i have only two ordinary hands, with a very ordinary capicity to make things done...and most of all I AM JUST 24!with so many things coming me way..i cant handle the calamities...i cant handle these challenges anymore..i'm breaking into pieces...

not just that, trouble with peers @ work..argh, how i hate 'em..but i dont give shits that much, i noe some of 'em (of which is among me classmates) is constantly havin a 'backside talking' about me...these are the people u would call backstabbers...people that u cant trust...infront of ya face they'd be the sweetest of people, but God knows when u turn u head over to the other side...but ya noe, bad mouthing others is only done when u are dissatisfy with that person, and the cause of these dissatisfactory to occur?? simply said, they envy ya with things that they dont have or lacking off..things that irks them so bad, they cant do anything about it but just TALK about it! or....they badmouthing others because they feel they are "OH-SO-PHUCKING" great..(which i doubt abt it) that they have nothing better to do but always in between conversations talk about others and ignore friends eventho these friends is right on their face!! IN OTHER WORDS, THESE PARTICULAR CLASSMATES OF MINE WHICH IS ALSO AN INTERN HERE..THEY'RE NOTHING WITHOUT EACH OTHER..IT'S ONLY BECAUSE THEY STAND WITH 2-3 OTHERS WHO SHARED THE SAME ATTITUDE AS THEM, THEY ACT AS IF THEY ARE THE GREATEST....BUT WITH OUT THE SUPPORT OF THE REST OF THE CLAN..THEY CANT EVEN BREATH!! i pity one gal in particular..she thinks she's so phucking great...but she is so clingy with the other gal..of which whenever that gal is not around she seems dead both in&outside..and that to me is pure PATHETIC!

soz, me words may sound blunt and harsh, but i'm just under so much stressed in life..i cant help it...tis is a good therapy to let things out from ya by bloggin tis is one way to do least i hope im not as streesed as sopeq..of whom only 2 months in tv3 got him diagnosed by doctor having high-blood-pressure!few....


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