The Story of Nurul,Aishah,Cha2,AkaZukii

why can't life be much easier than this? no complications, no agonies, no worries...just pleasant....everyday, but we would not call that life now would we?

Thursday, October 20, 2005

salaams

"kullu nafsin za ikatul maut..."every living things will surely die....
hari ini sayup sekali...hujan tak berhenti-henti dari malam semalam..membawa ke tengah hari ini..masih sejuk..mendinginkan...bagikan mengerti pemergian seorang lagi umat Islam yang dijemput Allah SWT pagi ini....Al-Fatihah buat Allahyarhamah Datin Seri Endon, the First Lady of Malaysia, passed away on 20th of October 2005 at approximately 8 AM...

alhamdulillah..Allahyarhamah meninggal dalam bulan ramadhan..bulan yang mulia..bulan yg penuh keberkatan...alfatihah sekali lagi buat Allahyarhamah. amin.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

you won't admit you love me
and so how am i ever to know
you only tell me
perhaps perhaps perhaps
a million times i ask you
and then i ask you over
again you only answer
perhaps perhaps perhaps
if you can't make you mind up
we'll never get started
and i don't want to wind up
being parted, brokenhearted
and so if you really love me
say yes
but if you don't dear
confess
and please don't tell me
perhaps perhaps perhaps
if you can't make your mind up
we'll never get started
and i don't want to wind up
being parted, brokenhearted
so if you really love me
say yes but if you don't dear
confess but please don't tell me
perhaps perhaps perhaps

Saturday, October 15, 2005

When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so fucking special
But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here
I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice when I'm not around
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special
But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell I'm doing here?
I don't belong here
She's running out again
She's running out
She runs runs runs
Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You're so fucking special I wish I was special
But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here
I don't belong here

Friday, October 14, 2005

salaams

hari ni hari yg memenatkan....pagi2 lagi dah ke kelas....petang pun ada kelas...tak sempat nak balik buka...nasib baik ada watashi no ai-chan redz1..whom coincidently have a "berbuka" assignment at Quality Hotel nearby...and it was indeed my rezeki i guess to joined him because en zul's class that evening ended late..very late..'over-run' :p thus, i rushed like a mad woman...from uitm to QH (which luckily is just a few yards away) parked the car..and walked really fast as if i'm competing in the annual Malay Mail Big Walk ( i can't run thanks to my overly used heels..totemo abunai desu yo!!) but this time around unlike the previous 'berbuka" occasion i had with atashi no ai-chan, food is only served after salat Mahgrib..which is well..kinda ruined the whole hunger for food and spoils the mood to eat...guests were only served cold drinks and dates...break for salat jamaah...and only then, we could dig in for foods to fill the empty tummy. but, whatever it is...i am grateful and syukur at least i got to eat some yummy food thanks to ai-chan :-)

ooh..way before i guess my 'happy ending' for the day, the beginning of my day was a bit sucky. tho i came on time for japanese class (and to make it worse, i have TEST), the parking lot was really jammed packed with cars....i notice lately, every Friday there will be an awful lot of "pak guards+mak guards" patrolling the parking lot near the faculty. thus, you can only 'dream' to park there ;p so, like the rest of the normal disadvantage bunch, i parked at the student's parking side..and marched in bravery up the steep and disoriented stairs to make my way to my faculty up on the hills. by the time i got to class, i felt i almost die. lost of breath..heart pumping fast (of course this also indicates that i am NOT a fit person! :p )

all that obstacles slowed me down and i finally came quite late to class. panic attack starts to sink in as the first part of the test ended quite fast..and soon came the second part which is more demanding and scary: as i did NO preparation for it. luckily, Normah sensei was the supervisor for that test and in charge of the grading..why i say lucky? Normah sensei had taught me twice before so it was always pleasant to see some familiar face around when you're panicking due to last minute revision for a very important test :p..but whatever it is, alhamdulillah..i made it through.....quite well i must say..chatted and sharing infos with sensei (she's the best sensei i ever have!! i'm forever indebt to her for giving me the chance to materialize my biggest dream:going to japan!)

soon after that little triumph in academia, i joined the rest of my "armadillo clan" to finish up our presentation's slides which is due in a few more hours later that day. the 'leader' of our clan almost sparked a fight in little disagreement with this 'oh-i'm-so-god-damn-good' person in the clan. the thing abt this individual, thee only knows to talk the talk but never walk the walk..dlm bahasa melayunya: TIN KOSONG-la! thee only knows to critize others but never on 'theeself'( ok ok i know there's no such word as theeself in english, im keeping my writings a secret i have no other options ;p) the thing that irks me the most abt thee everytime thee does something like this is JUST THT thee never once deliver/proved that thee is on the worthy part to give aways criticism. to thee, "boleh blah!" (tribute to my 'leader' favourite phrase :p )

as if the tension is not enough for me that day, i came back to my car(it's actually atashi no ai-chan no kuruma desu..which make it worse for me huhu) to only find it SCRATCHED by some IDIOT!!&$(&*&%#^#%^ (damn pissed off!!) and it was no tiny scratch..it was a BIGGIE scratch..the paints were literally scrapped off..huhu. i mean, if you knew and well realised that you're going through a very narrow place where there's a lot of car..DRIVE YOUR PHUCKIN' CAR CAREFULLY AND SLOWLY!! mind other cars!!!! you know damn well the parking lot in UiTM is well congested..so careful lah!!! idiots!! you scratch other people's car, you'll end up scratching your own car as well...tak ke itu bodoh tahap gaban??!??!

and so with more tension built up in my mind, body and soul...the much anticipated class for that evening made its way in. en zul had promised that this time around classes is scheduled to start on time..but hearie hearie...he was late. yeah ok everyone knows he's bz so that it accepted i guess...but the downside for that delayed presentation was, the class were forced to end at 630 pm!!!just abt 30 minutes away from breaking fast time...and not just that, as there were 7 groups presenting today, the earlier groups were at an advantage point...as ppl were listening tentatively and attention span were longer....but vice versa for the few last groups which include my group: "armadillo clan".


nevertheless, had we been earlier groups i think my group still lacks a few documents or so thus it will be a losing point if we were to start early as it will give more time for en zul to realise the mistakes and missing points...in the end of the day...we still did a good job eventho lacks documents here and there..but the concept as en zul's said, were strong. so that i'm happy...at least the "burnt" RM12 for color printed proposal copy didnt go in vain. overall..a satisfying day indeed. alhamdulillah..it went by if not smoothly but at least everyhting is in placed..and i am still living to see another day insyaAllah. :-)

Wednesday, October 12, 2005


salaams

picture speaks a thousand words....kesian sungguh budak kecil kashmir yang tak mengerti apa2 ini.....sehelai sepinggang dek kerana gempa bumi yang ditetap Allah melanda bumi pakistan, afganistan dan india...sekelip mata, semuanya musnah..entah mana ibunya..entah mana ayahnya...dalam bulan suci ramadhan dugaan yang lebih berat Allah berikan pada mereka...loking at this picture i can't help but wonder, if this were to happen to me, am i all tht ready?? gosh, my answer is NO.

last night when i was merely sleeping...my house shook very mildly...not because earthquakes...was caused by the fast moving giant trailer that passed by in front of my house. [my house is located exactly in front of a major highway in petaling jaya..LDP]..this thing had been going on eversince the completion of that LDP..but after all unexpected tragedies...i wonder,what if it's a tremor from series of unexpected earthquakes? could my house withstand that then?? sedangkan lori berat yg lalu laju dah bergegar rumah aku tu, inikan gempa bumi...nau'zubillah! minta dijauhkan...

with that thoughts deep in my mind,i shut my eyes to sleep in fear and try to prepare myself mentally for the unexpected. now whenever there's heavy vehicles tht passes by my house with incredible speed..shaking the whole structuture of my unprepared house for earthquakes disaster i can't help but to say prayers and zikir to Allah...please don't be it me like the kasmiri gal up there..amin.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005


salaams

sejak masuk ramadhan dah lama tak update blog ku ini...bukannya apa..been busy like hell...1st week of ramadhan is up..so far so good...been eating like a p*g..seriously! i ate a LOT! current weight::SO MUCH WEIGHT:: that's for sure. eversince ramadhan starts, i had been wearing 'baju kurung' to class everyday..decieving some of me friends..they thought i did it because of ramadhan month...hahaha...well not really...of course it goes inline with the ramadhan theme and spirit n all...but the main reason was purely because, NONE of me pants fit me anymore!! what a TRAGEDY!

as if that tragedy is not enough tormenting me life as it has always been this past of late, school life is starting to 'killing-me-softly'...i think this semester by far is the most challenging semester for me...i guess it all started out from the extanded semester prob and later tht prob ruined the whole cake i have this semester. and me cake this sem is not even chocalate! **whattt??*gila sat.

no friends...no life...no fun...nada!i think there are just about 2 or 3 individuals in me newy class that i could/would talk to..the rest of the clan, no way jose.they all have their own gangs and agenda with each other..besides, like safuan's remark abt 'em, they are all kinda "poyos" and i very much agree with him. and now that almost 4 months have passed, i have seen enough "kepoyosan" in most of them. but again, this is just a matter of opinion...

by comparison, i think my previous classmates were more serious and with 'substance' compared wth the newies one. of course there's this one particular person that everyone speaks highly of..everyone i noticed in the class wanna get personal with tht person if they could.but i don't blame tht person at all..she deserves every bit of it, if not because of her reputation and background..she is who she is, a humble and terribly nice person. having said tht, i just hafta say, it is indeed because who she is that makes her what she is today..get it?? LOL! *sigh* whatever it is, she is surely one lucky gal! how awfully wonderful life could be for someone like her...but one thing for sure, she could never "win"if put side by side with one beautiful lady friend i have and been missing like hell as my companion in class...missy haza! i'm not just saying this because she's a friend, but she's just sooo perfect..i know nobody is perfect but thru me little not-hazel eyes, she's the embodiment of human perfection..yeap, that's wht she is and i'm glad i have a friend like her in my life.

oh how time flies.....felt like just last month i was in this new class, new surroundings...perhaps i feel this way because even now it has been almost 4 months, i haven't gotten to know any of them well..and now, in just 3 weeks time, classes will finish...and next will come a brief eid-break, and soon after that..FINAL EXAMS!! and just after that...INTERNSHIP STARTS!!! how stressful...here i am a struggling student on a verge of insanity...curing my distressed mind with fattening chocolates that kills my curvious body shape (^_^)..oooh how i loathe school life..definitely sucks!!